Reasoned debate requires a mutual understanding of the definitions of concepts. If we were to talk of water, for example, we would have to come to some mutual understanding of the definition of water. The same goes for definitions of conservativism, liberalism, etc. We do not have to agree on the definitions, but it is essential for each party to disclose the definitions of their terms.
That said, it is quite clear that the definition of “donut” is, in the popular vernacular, too widely defined. Take, for example, this definition of donut. I mean, for goodness sakes, they have “muffins” in the “types of donuts.” Wikipedia has a page on donuts.
A doughnut, or donut, is a sweet, deep-fried piece of dough or batter.
This means that any dough (or, “do”) that happens to fall into the fryer emerges as a donut. This can’t be right. This list of donut varieties is long and includes a quite disparate array of so-called “donuts.” In Poland, the P?czki is just as much a donut as the donuts you would get at Mister Donut in Japan. To Wikipedia’s credit, they do have a list of controversial donuts, including sweet bagels. They also have a list of donut-relations-that-are-not-donuts, defined as such:
There are no general claims that the following doughnut-related-items are ‘kinds of doughnuts’ although they are doughnut-like in two crucial senses: they are ‘toroidal in shape’ and are treated as being food and in some cases are (or can be) served fried, but are not commonly (and/or historically) explicitly described, referred to, and accepted (and/or, where appropriate, translated) as a doughnut, or type of doughnut.
Most donuts should simply be placed in a “fried-dough” category.
I’m arguing for a strict Americanization standardization of the donut. I believe in international diversity, but when it comes to defining what is and what is not a donut, I draw a ring that stretches from California to the New York islands, from the redwood forests to the Gulf-Stream waters.
From this argument, I submit my definition of donut:
“Any deep-fried fried, sweet-tasting dough made in the United States of America that is not a cruller or a fritter or a muffin or anything else like that. It can have sprinkles. It can be filled with jelly. It can be glazed.”
I think it should also have an American flag poked into it.
That would reduce the ambiguity, but the real proof is in the taste. Anybody can stick an American flag in it, but only real Americans can make a donut.
I…I can’t believe what I’m reading here.
The pastry racism and essentialism in this post is simply gobsmacking. My gob is so smacked that gob juice is flying EVERYWHERE.
EVERYWHERE.
Have you not heard of the term DIVERSITY? Or is it just a concept good for liberal arts departments? Pastry diversity matters, too. I say, let apple fritters and cruellers under the Big Tent of Doughnut. To be so exclusive smacks of elitism, and proves former Vice-Presidential Candidate John Edward’s maxim that there ARE Two Americas: The America where Upper Class Snobs lord over Pastry Superiority over all baked goods, and the Working Class just suck on it.
Not only that, but your “definition” is without the specificity required by even the most rudimentary FUNK & WAGNALL’S. How do we get past the vague term of “anything else like that”? And what about frosting? Millions of doughnuts in America are frosted: are they not worth consideration? To completely disenfranchise this teeming population of pastries is an act that beggards what happened to the Dems’ superdelegates in Michigan and Florida.
Will fritters have to sit at the “Fritters Only” counter at the Joshua Bakery? Will there be “Donuts Only” water fountains where cruellers cannot drink? Frosted doughnuts must sit at the back of the bus?
You’ve…you’ve lost a reader.
Segregation of donuts is the only way to guarantee the purity of the American donut. We must stop the incursion of unAMerican donuts into our nation’s children and donut-eating adults. Yes, millions of donuts are frosted– you may put that in the definition. And for your information, it is impossible to “suck” on a baked-good such as a donut. As for the working class, let them eat cake.